Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Mr. A's Review of.....Green Lantern

The Story
Hal Jordan is--

--Okay, I honestly can't talk about this film. Find out why below...

The Review
This film is the biggest piece of crap I've ever seen. This makes Superman Returns look like Wrath of Kahn! First off, the CGI was HORRIBLE. The costumes looked like they were photoshopped onto the actors, Oa looked like it was a reject city from Lord of the Rings, and the Guardians looked liked wrinkled Smurfs.
Now let's talk about the acting. Ryan Reynolds plays Hal Jordan like he's playing Tony Stark mixed with Han Solo. He's more suited to play either Guy Gardner or Kyle Rayner.
The plot was so hastily thrown together and the pacing was so damn choppy that NONE of the film makes any sense around the half-way mark.

The Verdict
Seriously, it's a waste of time.

OMG, I honestly can't say anything else about this movie....

Jaa mata,
Mr. A (Green Lantern, sector 2814)


Totoro said...

I didn't think it was that bad. Perhaps I can should offer a 2nd opinion review of "Green Lantern" for my next feature article.

Remy said...

What bothers me the most about the review is that if it's the biggest piece of crap you've ever seen, why isn't it a 0 instead of a 5? Are you looking forward to seeing even bigger pieces of crap in the future?

Totoro said...


Mr. A clearly lists the movie as a "negative" or "minus" 5.


But stay tuned. I shall be offering a 2nd opinion to this movie, along with new movie reviews in the coming weeks!

Remy said...

I thought the - was punctuation. :p